It's hard not to think what if...

There's no practical sense in having regrets in life. What happened happened and there's nothing you can do to change the past.

With North Carolina playing for the championship tonight, it brings back the only regret I have in my life. I'd give anything to be in Chapel Hill tonight when Carolina takes on Michigan St. for the NCAA championship. And I still would be if I hadn't left the program to transfer back to Cornell in 2005.

Even worse, I'd be two months away from getting my Phd.

It's hard not to think about the what ifs and maybes associated with this scenario. I'd have an entirely different life, in both positive and negative ways.

When I originally moved to Chapel Hill I wasn't very happy. I didn't have a car. I missed Amy (my girlfriend at the time) and I felt like alot of my friends were in to different things then I was. After my adviser informed me she was leaving the University in January or February of 2005, I myself started making plans to leave. I got a car in March and after that I was in love with Chapel Hill, but it was too late. I already had made finalized plans to come back to Ithaca. Oops.

At the time there wasn't a doubt in my mind that I made the right decision. I was coming back to Ithaca, I would get my degree from a tougher, more respected institution and I was probably going to marry the girl I was coming back for.

The years have borne out the fact that this doesn't go according to plan. At all.

If I never left Carolina I still would have ended up in the same place in regards to my situation with Amy - apart. I might have met someone else there and been happy, instead of seemingly just drifting through relationships to pass the time that don't even seem to affect me when they are over with. Then again - that might just be wishful thinking.

I might still be on my track to be Dr. Walsh in two months. That would be nice. Although in the career department, things haven't gone horribly. I have a decent job, despite the fact that I am considered lower than dirt in the company infrastructure. I get paid well. Well enough to own a home and afford some things. If I never left Carolina I'd still be dirt poor and own nothing. It's impossible to speculate how my salary would be affected long term, so I just won't even bother.

On the major negative side, I wouldn't have Jack. I might have ended up with another dog but who knows. All I know is that I'm glad I have Jack and I wouldn't if I was still there.

It's best not to think about things that might have been, but this truly is the ONLY regret I have in the course of my entire life.

Despite the fact that I won't be there tonight, I'll still be glued to the TV tonight hoping Carolina pulls off another national championship.

GO TARHEELS!